22nd April 2005
Well, the beginning of April was a bit like the beginning of January with the cold north easterly winds blowing. The atmospheric pressure and temperature hasn’t shifted my barometer from its setting which reads “Are you mad”. On saying that I did managed to get down to Balmaha a couple of times in the past month, but haven’t met anyone fool hardy enough to be out yet. That being said there are boats already moored at their respective buoys, so I could very well be wrong, which is nothing new, as I’ve been wrong, I think once before.

Now that we’re into the second half of the month, for those of you that are prepared to venture out the chances of a fish are improving each day as the water warms up (hopefully) and the fish head back to their native waters in their numbers. With that having been said I have an unconfirmed report of a 10lb fish having been caught by a Balloch fisherman, whilst trolling the Boturich shoreline on Saturday 16th, and a further two fish of 17lbs and 15lbs having been caught in the week beginning18th April. The 15lb fish having been caught up at the Carrick Rock, which is a bit off the normal at this time of year, down the Endrick Bank and along the shoreline to Boturich and back again. So don’t be afraid just because everyone else is turning at the Black Rocks and heading back, or turning at the Stables, doesn’t mean that the fish know the rules.

Things are still a bit slow at Balmaha at the moment and there’s not much to report on but this may well be the lull before the storm as we’re nearly into the magical month of May, when there’s a bundle of Spring fish caught.

Is anyone else faced with this problem or am I being singled out.

After some negotiation with ‘her that must be obeyed’ I struck a deal that would allow me to get my boat on the driveway for a bit of needed TLC. For those of you that don’t troll the lonely hearts columns in the newspapers it stands for ‘mug required to do what women want’ or in the context above, varnishing.

Now this is an awkward position for me to be in as ‘her that must be obeyed’ saw me with various pieces of sandpaper, a heat gun, a tin of yacht varnish and most importantly a paint brush, the one I had told her when she was painting the bathroom not to use as that was the good one for varnishing.

Anyway, getting to the point of all this, she saw just how meticulous I was when applying each coat of varnish, and then carefully lightly sanding it down before applying another coat. All this took a full week, which again she noted with great interest, and when I told her that it was done and she could get the driveway back, she came back with, “Great, cause I’ve bought paint for the eves of the house and I’ve borrowed a ladder so you can do it next week, and whilst your up there you can clear the gutters.” My feeble excuses of, ‘afraid of heights,’ and ‘It’s really a two man job, if you want, I’ll steady the ladders while you paint’ fell on deaf ears. I even tried to explain that my life was at risk out in the elements of the Lomond had I not spent the time varnishing my boat, and making it sea worthy. To which she remarked “you won’t need to worry about the elements of Loch Lomond, I’m warning you.” So chaps bear this in mind should you decide to tenderly care for the boat you love in front of a woman. So when I finally manage to get out on the water and you see my gleaming, highly varnished boat just remember what I had to go through to be here.

I had a query from a gentleman now living in New Zealand, and who once lived in Helensburgh and often fished the Loch for Pike. He has asked me if I knew of some old black and white photographs of a man sitting in his boat having just pulled in his nets and was holding two enormous perch, which he thinks the caption said were 8lb each. Does anyone know of this picture or can offer any help as to its authenticity, or even any current records of Perch having been caught in our system, I’d be extremely grateful and will pass on the details to Mr Stephen Leak in New Zealand.

The picture below has nothing really what to do with fishing but is a pose that I often adopt when under orders, sorry stress, in order to be at one with one’s self. Cheers.